waaaaaa...saiko nye aku nih~~
baru pagi tadi aku hepi gile~!! n now?? wtf is wrong with me???
here's the story.i dreamt somthing again today, the sort of dreams that make me so peaceful just like yesterday night..so i woke up, calmed down by the dream..not so stressed kan..maybe coz last night gak hang out with people so, im not that psycho a...tho i nearly cried one time...
anyway..i opened up my dA account, n i got a note from carol. third place for a contest. wii???...piupiupiu..??? mumiumiumi??...
my journal link
carol's contest winners journal link
im not sure wat's the prizes, coz i didnt enter for that, i dont know why i enter..-.- but i got a month (ye, sebulan saje..but its big for me la~~ so wattt~~) n i really have no idea wat to do about it, you know...then i thot maybe i should ask for help from the seniors la cam emmjay ke..jambang ke...
but then..suddenly something slap me----"thats only a month subscription! ~~ tu je pon!! what r u so hepi about!!!" wait..wait..wer did that voice come from...-.-
ngiowww...then immediately my smile vanished..
i told myself, "its okay to be happy..~~ be happy la..be happy~~~come on, ina..u can do it..be happy longer..hepi la lagi cam tadi..."
BUT DAMN I CANT!!!!!!
i wish i have somekind of--i dont know---like soap? detergent ? that can wash my brain off from all the negativity~ miooowwwwwwwwwwwwwww~~
i know i got all these things--my mom & brothers, my "art" thingy, my music, my friends, my job, the moneyblablablablabaaaa..my life's great...though i just broke up, but i think im alright..you know..yeah~ i think im okay..i think..yeah..-.-
but hell, why am i so sad!!!!!!!!!!! yeowwwwww
something just keeps dragging me down,..its really taking a toll on me..n i dont even know wat it is..hurm
n another thing..i cant seem to make myself eat,...sometimes i forgot to, sometimes i just dont feel like it..and yeah, other times just plain lazy to eat..
sleep! yes lets talk about sleep! i cant sleep more than 6 hours now!!! that's great for me sometimes..but when im like this, i wana sleeeepppp longer!! tak bleyh!!!!!!!!!!!! arghhhh!!!
hurm...
*inhale*
*exhale*
maybe i should go buy a cup of double shot coffee n get migraine n then maybe i'll stop thinking..
n i think..
i think...
rainbows make me smile.hell, rainbows make the whole world smile..hah..
n me.a loser.pathetic loser.
cheers to that~